Cracking up.

Today I had an emotional breakdown to this song.

Sometimes it’s really hard.

Number 24

What do you dip a chicken nugget in?

Tomato ketchup. Though I’m not eating meat any more. But I did everything in ketchup. 

 

 

Number 23

What do you drink with dinner?

Water. Or lemonade if Rus takes me somewhere classy like In-N-Out

Number 22

Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?

I wouldn’t bury it, I would adorn myself in that shit! And maybe send some of the garish stuff away to cash4gold and buy myself and favourite people something wicked fun.

Plus if I buried it pirates would always be bugging me to know where it is, which is fine if it’s Jack Sparrow but let’s be honest, they don’t really look like that.

Number 21

Whats your least favourite movie?

Violent slasher films. I don’t understand why you would want to be that uncomfortable for 90 minutes when you could be watching Ryan Goslings take his shirt off and be generally adorable.

Number 19 and 20

I spent most of my online time checking out MIley Cyrus’ twerking at the VMAs then giggling at the buzzfeed articles and GIFs that have been made, everything else slipped from my mind.  So two in one again…

19:Is it okay for guys to wear pink?

Yes. Providing they have the right complexion for it. Girls wear blue, kittens wear mittens and pugs seem to be dressing up at every opportunity so why the hell shouldn’t a guy wear a pink outfit?!

20:Do you still watch cartoons?

Yes but only with Rus or my sister Kate. Rus is the worlds biggest Adventure Time fan and we are having a slight adventure time theme in our wedding. Actually, if I’m really missing Rus I’ll put AT on because Finn is probably based on Rus.
In fact the sweetest text Rus ever sent me was “you’re the PB to my Finn”. I had pink hair when we met and I’m 99% sure that’s why I got asked on a date.

Number 17 and 18

I missed yesterday due to an unscheduled three hour paperwork session. See here for details! So I am rolling two into one.

17.) What size is your bed?

It’s one of those bed-and-a-half-bigger-than-a-single-but-not-as-big-as-a-double things. When I move to CA Rus wants us to get a Cali King. I think I’ll get lost in it.

18.) What is your song of the week? 

I just downloaded Macklemore and Ryan Lewis’ album The Heist. Pretty much loving the entire album and I refuse to pick a single song.

Wading through mud

Yesterday I got a call from my mum while I was at work, she was excitedly letting me know that a letter had come through from the US visa office in London.

I was so giddy I could hardly concentrate on the rest of my shift.

I raced home and tore open the letter expecting to find my interview date scheduled, planning to call my boss and give my notice, buy tickets to London and arrange a medical.

Except no.

Turns out the process is different to how I had deciphered the US immigration website – a site that seriously needs a re-write by a human not a lawyer.

The letter told me to visit the immigration site [yay!] and download four forms to fill out, one I have to fill in twice for some reason, and send them to the office. The next paragraph told me not to send anything until I was requested to do so. And that paragraph was in bold so it clearly is the most important.

Is this letter my request for the forms to be posted? Or am I waiting on a follow up letter?

While I wait for the office to open on Tuesday – because Monday is a bank holiday here, I have been filling in the paperwork, writing a list of queries and losing the will to live. Because of course the forms themselves are equally confusing. One of the three-page forms is very general and is used in several different visa applications. Thus, half the questions aren’t really relevant. Such as what kind of work I am hoping to do. I don’t know yet, I plan on being a housewife for a while and picking up some hobbies. But if I put that can I not apply for a greencard in case I get bored of baking and making jewellery?!

You see celebrities getting married for publicity stunts, rocking up to divorce proceedings pregnant with someone else’s kid and doing all kinds of things that really ruin the sanctity of marriage but that’s all okay because it’s people of the same mother country. I genuinely want to spend my life with Rus but, because we were born in separate countries, we have to go through the most tedious paperwork.

I guess they are screening for greencard marriages, and you know what it’s a great system. There is no way I would go through all this if I wasn’t genuinely head over heels in love with Rus.

If anyone has made it to the otherside of the K1 Fiance visa application please let me know your story and please let it have a happy ending!

Number 16

How many people have you slept with this week?

Every night I share my bed with Charlie the Chihuahua. He snores and takes up all the room despite being smaller than my head. He lays slap bang in the middle of the bed and refuses to budge. I put him in a dog bed last night. Instead of sleeping all he did was try and rearrange the pillows on my floor to create a step to get back in bed with me.

I haven’t slept properly in about 10 years out of love for this little chap.

Number 15

Do you chew your pens and pencils?

No. But If I need an extra hand I’ll hold the pen in my mouth which I guess isn’t the most hygienic thing to do. But then neither is having a pug lick your face and that happens on a daily basis.